"I Was Dating Other Women, Even My Husband Was Dating Other Women” – Prof Uju Anya Opens Up Candidly on Her Marriage, Bisexuality, and Why It Ended

Renowned Nigerian-American linguistics professor and outspoken advocate **Dr. Uju Anya** has shared a deeply personal and unfiltered account of her past marriage in a recent interview, revealing how her realization of stronger attraction to women, combined with an agreed-upon open arrangement, ultimately led to its end.

In the heartfelt discussion on the WithChude podcast with host Chude Jideonwo, Prof Anya emphasized that her marriage to her ex-husband was genuine, loving, and fulfilling at the start. She described falling deeply in love with him—he was attractive, funny, a great dancer—and committing fully to the relationship. However, about 10 years in, she came to the profound realization that her attraction to women was not just passing curiosity, but something deeper and more central to her identity.

Here are striking portraits of Professor Uju Anya, capturing her thoughtful presence and strength:

After honest conversations, the couple mutually decided to open their marriage ethically—allowing both partners to date others with full transparency and consent. “I was dating other women, even my husband was dating other women,” Prof Anya explained. “I was bisexual in my marriage.” She stressed there was no infidelity or deception involved; it was consensual non-monogamy rooted in love and honesty.

Yet, as time passed, her feelings for women grew stronger. “I was in love with my ex-husband, but I loved women more,” she reflected, noting that the emotional and physical pull became undeniable. Eventually, the arrangement could not sustain the marriage, and they chose to part ways amicably, prioritizing authenticity over continuation.

Here are powerful images of Prof Anya speaking passionately at events, embodying her courage and clarity:

Prof Anya, who has since found love and legally married her “dream wife,” Dr. Sirry Alang, in 2024, shared the story to foster understanding around sexuality, ethical non-monogamy, and personal growth. She addressed misconceptions head-on, clarifying in follow-up posts that open marriages with mutual agreement are not cheating, but a valid path for some couples.

Her vulnerability has sparked widespread conversation across social media and Nigerian online communities, with many praising her bravery in discussing topics often shrouded in stigma.